By Bree Hocking
After a summer of VP speculation, we can finally breathe a sigh of relief. Joe Biden, the man destined to be somebody’s running mate (although earlier in the year I would have sworn he was Hillary’s boy) has been named to the Obama ticket – now back to the regularly scheduled rehashing of his strengths (he can find Iraq on a map and pronounce funny names) and weaknesses (but he makes crap up), the broader psychological implications of the pick (now we don’t have to worry about who will be answering that annoying 3 a.m. phone call/text message) and how it will all play with various and assorted demographics (namely Hillary Clinton).
Of course, we might have avoided the endless palaver and prognostication had we just taken a cue from Hollywood’s success story of the year: “The Dark Knight.” The latest in the Batman franchise has raked in nearly half a billion dollars to date and is on track to be the year’s dominant pop culture happening. As previously noted, both Obama and McCain have voiced their desire to be the masked crusader himself. All that was needed to make the transformation complete was an appropriately named sidekick. And Obama didn’t have to look far to find the guy who fit the bill…Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. was waiting patiently all along.
Like the fictional Robin, Biden is peppy and full of verve (check out that youthful bounce onto the stage at the Old State Capitol in Springfield), cheeky when necessary (he also wonders what McCain talks about around his seven kitchen tables), prone to bizarre verbal utterances (known to make reporters, Indian-American convenience store owners and African-American presidential candidates wince) and eager to fight for justice for the little guy (he rides Amtrak for God’s sake). Plus, there’s his genetically inherited car salesman grin (it’s so bright it’s amazing he can appear in public without a mask) and his ability to take his sartorial cues from the big boss (nothing says we’re on the same page like the coordinated blue and red ties and rolled-up shirtsleeves that Obama and Biden sported today at their joint appearance).
John McCain, Batman wannabe number #2, doesn’t have it so easy. Among the middle names of his veep contenders are two Josephs, a James and a Mitt (Romney dropped his decidedly uncool first name of Willard long ago). Perhaps McCain should consider finding himself a new superhero. Sources tell me the Six Million Dollar Man is available.
